Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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