Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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