Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
