Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
