Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
