32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
jump out the window naked night went bad
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
