There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
