How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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