apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize