You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
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