Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
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