I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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