I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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