@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Randomize
