I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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