Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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