Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
