dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
