I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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