I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Randomize
