Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
