Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
