So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
