So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
