just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
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