I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
