Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
