Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
he quoted the bible to break up with me
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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