How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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