Hey man sorry I got all grabby
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I need moral support for this bender
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
