He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
