i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize