Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
