Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
