Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
