I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I made him laugh his dick is mine
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
