I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
