What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize