I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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