his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
