I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
We have started to decorate penises.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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