My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
