It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
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