Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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