Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
