I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
