you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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