10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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