Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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