She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
