one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
All the doctor said was why
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
