i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Randomize
